I think it is great to have input from an adult who was home educated- it seems we are just now beginning to hear from those who were on the student end of that equation.

What I would like to point out is that one can only speak from one’s perceptions and experiences. One cannot speak for the whole, as there are too many individuals that make up that whole. Home education is not a system accountable to meet any certain standards, and by golly, let’s keep it that way. I have no desire to fit into someone else’s mold.

Dana- I think your experiences, while not ‘unique’ in the sense that no one else on the planet has had those experiences, but that they cannot be the measure of home education overall. Just as I had awful public and private school experiences, I know folks who loved everything about going to school, and thrived in that environment. Those are also the people whose parents were lovingly involved in every aspect of their child’s life- talking to teachers, at every activity and event- and IMO parents are usually the ones who make or break a child’s education.

I know some homeschooled adults who had a wonderful experience, and can’t wait to home educate their own kids, or are already in the process. Other than the article on the Indy website, I haven’t met any homeschooler-as-adult who hated being homeschooled. I have a 19 year old boy in the military who thanks me all the time for homeschooling him. Am I the one who is unique? I think not.

I agree that it is difficult not to sound bitter, and I don’t have a problem with someone expressing regret and displeasure about events of the past- my only objection to any post on your blog is the broad brush approach- that what was true for you somehow must be true for many or most homeschoolers. And that is simply not so. There are just too many variables- from the family dynamic to geographical location to choice of curriculum and activities for any of us to say that Our Homeschool is The Typical Homeschool.

I am interested in your further thoughts and always enjoy the discussion.

I’m glad my blog is starting to generate discussion. I have been really busy with graduate school and normal family stuff, but have started to post again. I marked my own blog as controversial. I’m conscious that the nature of my blog may not be appropriate or welcome for young kids searching the web on the topic and I wanted to make sure there was a warning so parents could make that decision themselves. Also, I misspelled my e-mail address so I didn’t realize I was getting comments! But I’ve since rectified that so comments should start to appear.

Also, and what I think is the biggest struggle for me about writing this blog, is that I have found (in my own personal life experience) that it is very hard to express the experiences I have had (and what I observe to be hallmarks of a larger social process) without sounding bitter! Also, and it is unfortunate–when I do express any negative opinions about the practice to proponents of the movement, I’m automatically labeled as “unique” or coming from some kind of severely disturbed environment. Neither of which I believe to be true! Don’t get me wrong, we all have unique experiences in education, but I also went to public school and fit in just fine. I, for the most part, excelled at homeschooling, more so than even some of my siblings. I guess the whole point of the blog is to show that within my unique experience there are some commonalities between homeschooling (religious or not I would argue).

Blogging is new to me and I’m finding a great way to work through these thoughts, feelings and ideas. I hope you will all continue to give feedback!

Thanks!
~Dana

It’s also possible that she’s having computer problems as that happened to me when our family’s laptop crashed & I wasn’t able to blog for several weeks.

I know another blog that had that happen and they thought it was someone flagging them just to spite them. It turned out to be an error with Blogger, however, and no one had done anything.

I wonder if that blogger has been flagged by those same folk and has had to moderate because of those same folk?

Anyhow, thanks for the link Dana. I think we need to here from those who’ve been homeschooled, even if their experiences don’t reflect our own.

As a public school teacher, I made dozens of phone calls to parents to discuss their child’s failing grades. Many times the answer I received was, “What do you want me to do about it?” As a private school teacher, I held hundreds of face-to-face parent-teacher meetings to discuss their child’s successes and failures. I came to the conclusion that there is no state or federal program, nor any amount of money that can be spent, that can fix the problems facing education today. The single biggest problem facing education today is good parenting, and good parenting cannot be legislated. So I agree with you when you wrote, “It is the family, not the school system, that serves as the foundation of a child’s life and even of society as a whole. When families are dysfunctional, out of balance or otherwise “cracked,” the effects cannot so easily be repaired. Even the most excellent of teachers cannot so easily repair the damage because their renovations are only superficial.” That is what the Nebraska Youth Minister fails to see when he sees home schooled children who look, to him, as lacking social skills. He sees, as the norm, the hundreds of children who populate a failing public school system. Next to these children, healthy home schooled children look abnormal. The normal becomes abnormal. Can it be reversed?

Shawna, you said:

I think she just reinforces my feelings that homeschooling works for some and not for others, that some are “qualified” to homeschool and some simply are not, even if that word bothers many in the community.

I have mixed feelings about this. I think all parents are, by nature of being parents, “qualified” to homeschool. Meaning that if one truly understands that the parent possesses the educational authority, and has the best interests in the child at heart, other factors should not be presented as a barrier.

I am not talking about abuse (just to be clear), and I don’t even know in this case. I don’t see where sending the kids to school would have really changed anything, really. The family still would have been that perfect exterior on a cracked foundation.

Perhaps, as Kristina noted, this could have actually made adjusting more difficult.

What I do feel strongly about is that families need to realize that they bear the responsibility for their child’s education. That does not mean homeschool them. It means taking responsibility…following up with teachers, knowing what the child should be learning, enforcing homework, standing up for the child in the system when necessary, etc.

If all parents saw education as their responsibility, one which they are free to enlist the help of others to obtain (through the private or public options), I think we would not have the problems we have in our schools today. Because most of our nation’s education problems are not with funding or teacher training, but with societal factors.