Let me get this straight. We, as homeschoolers, are supposed to send our kids to public school so that they can be properly socialized. Once they are there, however, the school has to hire an outside, non-profit group to come in and teach their elementary-aged students how to behave on the playground?
So last year Wright decided to outsource recess. He hired Sports4Kids, an Oakland, Calif.-based nonprofit organization that introduces students to a regimen of traditional playground games, along with a more closely supervised version of such team sports as basketball. The program also stresses conflict resolution, with disagreements mediated by, of all things, rock-paper-scissors. Washington Post
Don’t get me wrong. I think I like the idea. It sounds like a much needed program to deal both with the children’s need for physical exertion and the fighting these schools are experiencing on the playground. Here is a bit of insight not often applied to homeschools when socialization comes up:
Traditionally the one period of the school day when children are free of adult-imposed structure, recess is increasingly regarded by educators as a trouble spot. They say that in the Xbox- and Internet-dominated world of many students, the culture of healthy group play has eroded, turning recess into a chaotic and sometimes violent period where strife from the schoolyard can spill over into afternoon classes. Ibid.
So free play is important. That is the one draw-back of this program, but if the children cannot handle free play, it must be taught to them. Not by their peers, but by trusted adults who can intervene and help them to make wise decisions and resolve conflict. Something homeschooling parents have been saying for a long time. You learn to get along from people who know how to get along. And even for those in the public school, it begins in the home, not on the bus on the way to your first day of kindergarten.
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The Carnival of Homeschooling is up at Melissa’s Idea Garden.
“…it begins in the home, not on the bus on the way to your first day of kindergarten.”
Fantastic, this what I’ve been saying for years. (yes, I know, I’m not the only one) But when did we, as a culture, decide that 15-25 other 5 year old kids are better able to teach my child how to get along with other kids than I am? How logical is it to expect my 4-5 year old girl to become a mature, well adjust child precisely because of a daily 45 minute bus ride with children from all grades and no supervision?
I do, of course, agree that children need to spend time with other children and that they need unstructured play time. But “unsupervised” isn’t the same as “unstructured.”
My favorite quote from the article, “Our school system has failed historically to teach our kids how to resolve conflicts.”
In teaching ps I saw lots of horrid social interaction, kids being cruel to each other over the dumbest things. I wanted a more kind and safe enviroment for my own. With 5 kids we have plenty of practice in conflict resolution within our walls and in our daily lives.
Perhaps if daycare centers and preschools allowed their children more time outdoors in free play and they were taught the games by the teachers they would do more real play in elementary school at recess ON THEIR OWN.
When I was a child in the 1970s we were forced to be outdoors all day by our mothers and all the neighbor kids (save for one family with an obsessive mother who feared her children would get dirty or hurt)—we all were out there finding our own play for many hours a day, from when school got out to dinner, then after dinner to bedtime. We had all different ages of kids and both boys and girls. The older kids taught the younger kids certain games.
A high number of children are being raised in daycare and ‘preschool’ rather than being at home with mom during the daytime. Those children are age separated and it is the blind leading the blind with regard to things like learning hopscotch, so it doesn’t get taught to the kids by anyone.
I think too the kids in elementary school are in school longer and more caged (physically) than when I was in elementary school and had two recesses. In my town they do lunch then recess all in one shot, so they are trapped in the classroom all morning and all afternoon. I think some negativity that happens during recess is due to blowing off steam and being able to ‘let their hair down’ but it is forced in one small window of time.
Additionally the focus on group learning in the class I feel can raise tension between students. The only time that can be released is at lunch or at recess. I was a “fast learner” in school and was quite bored most of the time, waiting for other kids to finish their work. However if I was put in charge of a few other kids for ‘group learning’ I don’t think I was prepared for that and it could have been disasterous. I can only imagine if I was with some of the bullies who resented me for getting good grades and I was expected to somehow teach and help them. Oh my. Whoever came up with that model of classroom teaching is in denial about group dynamics of less than perfect children.
Another factor was that when I was in public school our teachers were outside with us, guiding us and disciplining us. Union rules are applied here in Connecticut where teachers do NOT do recess. My friend said that two teacher’s aides watch the kids in many classrooms. That is a problem on rainy days when the children are left in the classroom unsupervised, while the two aides go from room to room trying to supervise them. What happens in those classes when the kids are alone is not all good according to my friends and the moms I know from Scouts. I have heard stories of profanity name calling in 2nd grade, 2nd graders throwing chairs at other kids, bullying by hitting and other physical acts, and kissing of ‘a boyfriend and a girlfriend’ in 3rd grade. These bad things are happening in a town ranked by the state as having a GREAT school system and we have high test scores on the CMTs and “very involved parents”. Per pupil spending for elem and middle school is $9500 per year and $14500 for high school. Involved parents, money being spent, good grades and high standardized test scores don’t have anything to do with social issues with kids. Oh and our schools also have sociologists and psychologists to give therapy and watch and listen to the kids (all grades). “Lunch Buddies” is a program where the therapist sits and listens to the kids talk at their lunch table for a week to identify issues that need to be worked on with the students as individuals or as a whole. The therapist asks questions of the kids too and sees what they reveal about their family. SCARY STUFF!!
If this doesn’t seem real to you, read my thoughts on this book which is full of other stories like that.
http://thethinkingmother.blogspot.com/2008/07/first-thoughts-about-from-crayons-to.html
As a part-time aide in a local elementary school (a few years ago…mercifully, I was able to quit), one of my responsibilities was recess duty. We were supposed to let the kids work out their problems on their own. We were not supposed to intervene unless we thought a child was going to get hurt. Basically my job was to get the ball if it got kicked into the street. It was an absolute joke. Those upper middle class suburban white kids were animals. Pure and simple. Schools are NOT where I want my kids learning to “get along” in the world.
I agree, Christine. Actually, I was wondering about this a bit as I was writing it. When I was a kid, there were children I got a long with, and those with whom there were conflicts. But we weren’t confined to such a small space. Even our school playground was huge, much larger than the small fenced areas I see at daycares and neighborhood schools around here. There was space to just walk away.
I thought all day about this post, and I have decided that I cannot participate today in any conversation in which the main topic is socialization. My blood pressure couldn’t stand it.
I have to think about my health, you know.
(Just kidding. Brilliant as usual, Dana!)
Once you think the topic has been exhausted, the “system” proves you wrong.
Yes, remember back in the day, when it was expected that parents send their child to school already properly socialized?
When I worked as a substitute I HATED recess duty. I was supposed to be generally supervising all the kids when I didn’t know one child from another, was one of only a few adults watching over what must have been a hundred children, on a playground that was almost too big to see to the other side. And when it was all over, I had to round up all that belonged in my class (and some were invariably out in the “back forty”), make sure I had the right ones, and get them back inside in time for the next bell. It was an insanely stressful ordeal to be endured from time to time at a school where I otherwise enjoyed subbing. Herding sheep would have been more relaxing.
It was so much better when I worked at a small private Christian school — I was “the recess lady” among other odd jobs; and it was a different world; the playground was of a reasonable size, the classes were very small and only one or two classes went to recess at a time, and there were clear expectations about how to behave and treat one another. The children usually played group games of their own creation, and I don’t remember any conflicts between them.
ChristineMM wrote: “When I was a child in the 1970s we were forced to be outdoors all day by our mothers and all the neighbor kids (save for one family with an obsessive mother who feared her children would get dirty or hurt)—we all were out there finding our own play for many hours a day, from when school got out to dinner, then after dinner to bedtime. We had all different ages of kids and both boys and girls. The older kids taught the younger kids certain games.”
I live in a very small town where many children still get the opportunity to “run around the neighborhood” freely like this. I have mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, I want my children to have a little space to roam and visit and play. On the other hand, I’ve observed some of their friends who are allowed to prowl the neighborhood until sundown are, in some ways very independent and responsible, and yet in other subtle ways, disrespectful and rude, and I wonder if they don’t have too much freedom and what certain unchecked habits will yield when they are teenagers. A few annoying behaviors have cropped up in my dc that have been learned from friends and had to be nipped in the bud — but they have also picked up good habits, like calling home to check in or ask permission. They have had to contend with the poor socialization of others — but they have also learned to play foursquare and taught their friends to play Chinese jump rope. So I struggle to find the balance.
I’ve observed some of their friends who are allowed to prowl the neighborhood until sundown are, in some ways very independent and responsible, and yet in other subtle ways, disrespectful and rude…
I wonder if that is a sort of cultural difference? When I was a kid, everyone was out until the streetlights came on. You would wonder about a kid who wasn’t allowed to leave the yard. Now? There is so much fear about what will happen that I am concerned that most of the kids out are those whose parents don’t care as much.
“Once you think the topic has been exhausted, the “system” proves you wrong.”
Sad, but true.
I loved your post. My husband and I have been talking about the pro’s and con’s of homeschooling our two young children for a while and this makes a great point.
One of our friends has kids at a very high profile elementary school. A few weeks ago that school had what they called a “daddy-daughter” date to trick the dads into coming to the school where they were strong-armed into signing up as “volunteering” to take a day off work and monitor recess.
Apparently the playground is so out of control they feel they need masculine help. That isn’t the kind of socialization I think we’d be missing out on if we choose to homeschool. Thanks for sharing this article.
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